Dog gone it, there it is again. I usually don't blog on Sunday morning because I'm busy getting ready for services. And maybe I shouldn't this morning, but I'm going to. Yesterday I wrote a pretty raw blog. I intended it to be that way. It wasn't whining, I don't do that. It wasn't "poor me," I love my calling, I love being able to help folks, and I love standing up for folks that the rest of the world tries to keep down. It was simple frustration that finally found it's way through a crack in my filter. I'm usually much better at holding it in, but this past week finally got to me.
I answered this call nearly 12 years ago now, and in the beginning, I admit that I had no clue what I had signed up for. The brochure left a lot of stuff out, but that's cool. It has been one heck of a ride so far, and I know that's not going to change. But you know, I look forward to it.
In the beginning, I wouldn't have been nearly as brazen as I was in yesterday's blog, and I'm sure there are some folks who wish I weren't now. But as I've matured...as I've studied the Jesus that I had heard about as a kid, you know, the one we sang about "Jesus loves me this I know," the one that calls us to follow him...as I've read his stories, who he helped, what he did, and who he stood against...as I learned from him, I realized that if I am going to be a follower and not an admirer only, I can't just stand around with my hands in my pockets.
So, what you may have seen yesterday as ego or pride, was neither. It was frustration born out of passion. Frustration because this week I have been engaged in spiritual warfare and there were times when I felt like the other side was winning. Passion because I finally, in my late 30's, realized that John was serious when he said "love one another." And that he was just as serious when he said "Do not be surprised, my brothers, if the world hates you." And that he was really serious when he said, "This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down his life for us. And we ought to lay down our lives for our brothers."
It's not always a very popular stand, you know, laying your life down for your brothers. It's sometimes a pretty tough sell, actually. As admirers of Christ's, we're not asked to do that. But, if we want to follow him, and if we want to claim to the world that we follow him, it's not just asked, it's expected. I finally realized that, and you know, I really don't mind.
So, when I get like I got yesterday, recognize it for what it is...frustration born out of passion. I'm passionate about doing what I can to bring this kingdom thing here on earth. As long as this group hates that group, or this person feels hated by that person, or that person is hungry while this person sits down to a $100 steak, I will stay frustrated. In fact, if you read his stories again, Jesus stayed frustrated alot, so I'm in good company.
Peace
Jamie
I answered this call nearly 12 years ago now, and in the beginning, I admit that I had no clue what I had signed up for. The brochure left a lot of stuff out, but that's cool. It has been one heck of a ride so far, and I know that's not going to change. But you know, I look forward to it.
In the beginning, I wouldn't have been nearly as brazen as I was in yesterday's blog, and I'm sure there are some folks who wish I weren't now. But as I've matured...as I've studied the Jesus that I had heard about as a kid, you know, the one we sang about "Jesus loves me this I know," the one that calls us to follow him...as I've read his stories, who he helped, what he did, and who he stood against...as I learned from him, I realized that if I am going to be a follower and not an admirer only, I can't just stand around with my hands in my pockets.
So, what you may have seen yesterday as ego or pride, was neither. It was frustration born out of passion. Frustration because this week I have been engaged in spiritual warfare and there were times when I felt like the other side was winning. Passion because I finally, in my late 30's, realized that John was serious when he said "love one another." And that he was just as serious when he said "Do not be surprised, my brothers, if the world hates you." And that he was really serious when he said, "This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down his life for us. And we ought to lay down our lives for our brothers."
It's not always a very popular stand, you know, laying your life down for your brothers. It's sometimes a pretty tough sell, actually. As admirers of Christ's, we're not asked to do that. But, if we want to follow him, and if we want to claim to the world that we follow him, it's not just asked, it's expected. I finally realized that, and you know, I really don't mind.
So, when I get like I got yesterday, recognize it for what it is...frustration born out of passion. I'm passionate about doing what I can to bring this kingdom thing here on earth. As long as this group hates that group, or this person feels hated by that person, or that person is hungry while this person sits down to a $100 steak, I will stay frustrated. In fact, if you read his stories again, Jesus stayed frustrated alot, so I'm in good company.
Peace
Jamie
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